Category Archives: Birth Choices

Feb 27
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Birth In the Standing Position, by Lani Axman

By | Birth Choices, Birth Week, Pregnancy | 12 Comments

Have you wondered why so many women give birth on their backs? Do you think trying to push 7+lbs out what is usually a small opening while lying down seem to defy the laws of gravity? Then, you’ll appreciate this post today by guest, Lani Axman, the author of the well written blog, Birth Faith. 


Birth In the Standing Position

Lani Axman

A statement out of a recent Midwifery Today E-Newsletter reminded me of something I’ve been wanting to blog about ever since my doula training in February of ’09. Dutch midwife, Gre Keijzer, explained:

In my view, starting the second stage in a standing position can be seen as a preventive measure against the occurrence of shoulder dystocia. If it does occur, it can be easily corrected without having to perform all sorts of heroic manoeuvres.

I’ve become somewhat obsessed in the last year with giving birth in standing positions. My fascination began when my doula trainer, Mary, shared a handout adapted from an article by Jean Sutton called, “Physiological Second Stage or Birth Without Active Pushing.”
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Feb 27
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A Birth ReLOVEution

By | Birth Choices, Birth Week | One Comment

Leigh and I met through a mutual friend and I immediately warmed to the bright light and joyful spirit she exudes. Her writing is full of truth and kindness and I know you will enjoy her thoughts on birth as much as I have!  – Monna

A Birth ReLOVEution

By Leigh Steele 

“To be strong does not mean to sprout muscles and flex. It means meeting one’s own numinosity without fleeing, actively living with the wild nature in one’s own way. It means to be able to learn, to be able to stand what we know. It means to stand and live.” – Clarissa Pinkola Estes

To know the details surrounding my births, one must first know that they were preceded by a conscientious desire to dive deep into the spiritual work of birth.   I suppose this is a disclaimer of sorts for the somewhat abstract and lyrical method in which I tell my story.

My decision was not to VBAC, or HBAC, or to have a natural birth, or to birth at home.   While my last two births encompassed all of those minute details, they were singular in the lessons they revealed to me.

Like a circle of sacred stones laid out before me, I was given the choice to fall powerlessly into Fear – letting it overwhelm me – or to meet the transformational fire of Fear head on.  What emerged from that rite of passage – along with a trust garnered through deep support and evidence-based information – were the home births of my last two children.

It also reconnected me to the elder-women who unfurled their own bodies from their mother’s and, in that one great act of choosing amidst fear, made a home in my very DNA.  This is story of the medicine woman inside of me that is inside of you.  She is unafraid to confidently wrap her heart around her words, speaking from her own place of power, rewriting {her}story.   She names her desires, grinds her doubts into daily bread, and raises her eyes to the horizon as she places one foot in front of the other.  She is unhindered and unraveled and, with a soft heart, walks strongly upon the Earth.  It is, of course, with the medicine of the medicine woman in which I gave birth.

I didn’t embark on this journey as a lone warrioress.  Beside me and surrounding me were my tribe of women who would hold the space for me to address Fear, honor her, and transmute her into the breath of birth.  Within me was a primal knowing, relearned by diving into soul-work that lies at the source of each of us.  In the ancient lineage of our mother’s womb, we were all bestowed an inherent intuition, a shared wisdom.  By tapping into this, I found a freedom to express my most sacred wishes for my baby’s birth.

Our culture may tell you so, but it isn’t new-age, or hippy, or crunchy, or fringe to wax poetic (or un-poetic) about a woman’s authentic power, divine purpose, and tender yet wild nature.  It is our collective truth and to deny it is to rip up the roots your grandmothers planted in their fertile fields.  To mock it is to un-thread the stitches from the quilts that your great-grandmothers wove as they waited for the soup to cool.   We are worthy of feeling firmly embedded in our ancestral belonging.   Looking within in this way offers us a well-loved compass for life’s most challenging moments, including childbirth.

“Every woman who has the karma to bear children has within her the spirit of the birth shaman.  This spirit is composed of the cumulative wisdom of many lifetimes…and also the wisdom she has learned from the women in her family about childbirth and child rearing.  Equally important, the birth shaman contains the mother’s vision of the world and the philosophy she has evolved to survive, learn, and grow in it”.  – Walter Makichen, author of “Spirit Babies”

You see, the woman who chooses to birth in the hospital with an epidural is no different than me choosing to birth my babies in a tub of water at home.   We are one in the same, and particularly in that moment, connected by the altered realm of birth.    We both have trepidations and worries and heartfelt wishes for how we hope our babies are welcomed.  And we each find our way to birth through the channels and people and methods in which serve us most authentically.

The energy it takes to fully surrender to the Unknown path of birth is complex.  We are all in different stages of our life-paths, willing to invest a certain amount of depth and breadth into the story that will be our children’s births.   In the blank space between the words and moans and exhausted smiles are chapters with the same heading:   ReLOVEution.

And the greatest not-so-secret of all is that when we lay down the welcome mat to Fear:  we are all medicine women, we are all birth sha{wo}mans, we are each other’s most mighty allies.

“I hope you will go out and let stories happen to you, and that you will work them, water them with your blood and tears and you laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom.” ― Clarissa Pinkola Estés

♥ Inspired by my star-sister Misplaced Mama and the book she gifted us I’m a Medicine Woman, Too! ♥

 

About Leigh

With a BA in Communication from Ottawa University, Leigh was able to put her life-long love of words to good use as a business writer for a financial institution. After ten years in the cubicle world, Leigh shucked the spirit-draining environment of Corporate America and suited up for a job with the big bosses: as a Stay at Home Mom with a penchant for blogging.

After birthing and motherhood led her to experience her “authentic self” and a rejuvenation of her spirit, Leigh began advocating for women and babies as a birth doula. She also recently acted as the Vice President, and a staff writer, for the Arizona Birth Network.  Her latest venture is to gather tribes of women who want to delve further into birth-work with the launch of her doula e-course called “The Holy Work of a Doula”.

Leigh lives a small and crazy life in the lushness of the desert in Arizona with her three kids and husband.  She writes to survive personally and occasionally writes to survive financially.  You can find her rambling here and there.

Read more about Leigh’s work as a doula at http://thisholywork.com/

Feb 22
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Birth Week at Organic Mama Cafe!!

By | Birth Choices | One Comment

Since I’m in the whole “pregnant” girl phase, it’s not surprising I have only one thing on my mind right now – birth, birth, birth! Oh, it’s not that I don’t care about world news and other interesting topics. But, as in my other two full term pregnancies, I notice that the closer I get to the end, the more focused I am on what I’m doing – getting ready to bring new life into the world – and all that goes with that. This is a super-natural  process and I believe that focus makes birth something we as woman can accomplish!

At first, I resisted spending too much time writing about birth since I have friends who write excellent blogs on the subject, like Lani over at Birth Faith blog. If you haven’t been over there, she does a great job researching her topics and providing thought provoking conversation about birth in a non-judgmental environment.

But it’s clear that birth is going to be on my mind for a while so I figured I might spend a week talking about the birth topics that have been rolling around in my mind when I’m not chasing Destructo Girl or calling the paramedics because she’s decided to do a swan dive off the couch, headfirst onto the tile. (Yes, that really happened recently. And, YES. She is ok. Thanks. 🙂

So, next week, I’ll be hosting Birth Week right here at Organic Mama Cafe!

I am so blessed to know some very incredible women who have not only given birth but continue to support other women who are getting ready to join the circle called motherhood. These women will be sharing their stories and their expertise as well!

Birth week will begin next Monday, February 27th!

Help spread the fun by sharing the links to information and stories that inform, encourage or inspire you!!

 

Jan 24
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So, You think I’m Crazy to Birth at Home…

By | Birth Choices, Birth Week, Pregnancy | 17 Comments

Tonight I saw a friend who completely disagrees with me on a topic dear to my heart, my choice to give birth at home. It’s not something we can discuss for very long because it is something she’s very passionate about and holds strong feelings against it.

An RN who holds a key position in the Obstetrics department of a local hospital, she has the education to speak to the topic in an informed manner. She also believes strongly in what medical care can offer to women who wish to birth at a hospital.

While I have chosen to birth at home, I also value the importance of an obstetrician when one is needed. After all, I had a rather dramatic miscarriage  last year that resulted in severe hemorrhaging. I am grateful that medical care was there when I needed it! I truly love and respect my friend. I simply disagree that every birth qualifies as a medical event.

However, since this friend isn’t the only person in my life who doesn’t understand why I choose to birth at home, I decided to offer a few thoughts on the matter.

I’m not going to quote a bunch of statistics about how home birth is safer than hospital birth. You can find statistics on both sides of the argument that will support whatever position you have decided to embrace.

After having a hospital birth the first time, I wanted to try something different. It wasn’t that I had terrible care, I just felt I might be more comfortable in a different environment. So, I did my research and concluded home birth to be a safe choice for our second birth. The decision was a positive one for both my husband and me. Here are a few of the reasons I love it.

I believe my female body is made to give birth safely and that birth is not an inherently dangerous or even “medical” experience most of the time. My midwife is well trained to recognize warning signs and we have a transport plan in place should we need it.

I love being comfortable in my own space.

I love that I can wear what I want – even if it is nothing.

I love being free to make noise and believe me, near the end, I do!

I love that my midwife respected my wishes not to constantly check the dilation of my cervix in order to give me progress reports that make me feel like I’m not moving fast enough. My hospital birth was very discouraging from this perspective.

I love being able to move around or be still without anyone trying to mess with me in the middle of a contraction – like checking my cervix when I really don’t want to be touched. (Are you getting that this is kind of a big deal for me?)

I love how fast my labor seemed to go at home. Second births are typically shorter but mine also felt less intense. On reflection, I think this is because I was distracted by other things I could do (and did) at home, like clean my kitchen, pick up, eat, and ask my husband to buy oranges from the store so I could make gingerbread cookies. At which point, he questioned whether I was really in labor! Did I make the cookies? Ahem. Well, I was pushing out a baby within about 2 hours of asking for the oranges so… No, silly. haha! But the thought that I was going to make them was a positive distraction.

I love that I can labor in my bathtub. In my hospital birth there were no birthing tubs but my doctor assured me the shower would do the same thing because the shower would relax my nerve endings. Well!!!! I can assure you it is NOT the same thing! Good grief. The anti-gravity affect of the bathtub was a game changer in my second birth. So relaxing. If only I’d had that in my first birth – of a 9lb 7 oz baby!

I love having my midwife in attendance the whole time, encouraging me, monitoring the baby and ensuring that everything is progressing smoothly. This is also Robert’s favorite part. He felt so much more comfortable with my midwife’s attendance at my birth than the doc at my hospital (though the doc was fine). My midwife’s 28+ years of midwife skills and impeccable record are reassuring. She and her apprentice aren’t whipping in and out of my room just to inform me whether I’m dilating fast enough. Their attention is not divided between me and the other patients in their care who may need more attention than me. My midwife and her apprentice watch me – and only me – closely to ensure I’m still feeling strong and that the baby is ok, the entire labor.

I love the constant presence and support I receive at home from people I know well and actually love. For me, nearly a year of meeting with my midwife and her apprentice formed a bond between us that was more than that of a caretaker. That bond helped my midwife to know when I needed that extra encouragement to finish the work ahead of me, “You know, when you decide to get serious about pushing, that baby is going to come right out!” and I trusted her enough to listen. And you know what? She was right!

I love that my baby and I are not exposed to super-germs at home that are often present in the hospital.

I love that no one is pushing me to take drugs to hurry things along or just to prove that I’m not trying to be a hero.

I love knowing that my body has the strength to introduce a new life to the world, without drugs. Regarding people who think women who birth without drugs trying to prove their “heroism”, I have no illusions on this point. Just ask friends who’ve known me for years and remember me losing consciousness whenever I experience something acutely or surprisingly painful (like getting my ears pierced, hitting my elbow on a locker or getting my measles booster shot). I am not joking. I have naturally low blood pressure, so I faint in these situations. It’s always been a source of embarrassment for me! Birth is different because it’s not an acute or sudden pain but more like waves of pressure that increase gradually, making the pain bearable.

I love how fast I recovered from my drug-free delivery. So different from the first time when I felt so disconnected from my baby and almost a little nuts after my epidural. Narcotics and me – Not a good combination!

So, those are a few of the reasons home birth works for me.

Based on my research, I believe there are times that hospital births put babies at higher risk because of unnecessary interventions. That doesn’t mean they can’t be safe. There are also many times OB’s and L&D nurses provide optimum care for their patients and save lives.

In either birthing environment, we can do our best to make wise, informed choices but in the end, the outcome isn’t really in our hands as mothers (or anyone else’s). My own faith in the divine leads me to believe that the best plan is to do the research, commit to a course of action with a care provider who shares our vision and move forward in confidence and without regret.

So friends – if you’re looking for a sermon on home birth from me or you want to feel guilty about your birth choice, you’re not gonna find it here!

How did you make choices about your birth?