Category Archives: Birth Week

Mar 01
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Connecting the Circle with your Placenta

By | Birth Choices, Birth Week, Natural Health | 2 Comments

Guest writer and Herb Mother blogger, Latisha, shares some thoughts with us about the incredible placenta that nourishes a baby during 10 months of pregnancy. 

Connecting the Circle with your Placenta

by Latisha Guthrie

Making a baby is an incredible act of nature. When you really stop to think of the miracle of creation, how two tiny cells merge and divide again and again to grow an entire human being, it’s easy to have a deep reverence for life. One of the great miracles of preganancy for me, is the placenta. This powerful organ is created only for this one purpose by you and your baby. It is birthed into the world, just like the baby is. However, as it leaves your body, its contract fulfilled, it is often discarded without much thought. I’d like to challenge you to consider how the placenta plays into the miracle of life by honoring its place in creation.

If you’ve ever had an opportunity to really look at a placenta, you will know the miracle I’m talking about. The shape, size, and color as unique as each child, it contains all of the life force and love that nourished your child these nine months. The thin, yet perfect and strong veil that carefully covered the baby a reminder of how little armor is needed when the right nourishment is provided. The tree of life that is seen in every single pattern of veins, the story of your genetic history spelled out in every branch. For me, it is not simply an easily overlooked organ to be tossed aside.

The placenta is honored in many ways around the world. In many cultures it is revered almost as much as the child. In Nigeria, it is seen as the twin of the child and given full burial services. In other cultures it is buried under a tree and it is believed that the health of the tree is representative of the health of the child. Some bury the placenta with items like books or money to ensure a smart or wealthy child. In other traditions, the placenta is burned to ash and saved by the mother. Whenever she needs to feel close to the child, she will sprinkle some of the ash on her food. In traditional cultures, the placenta was a way to connect. Connect the child with Source, the parent with the child, the parent with Source, the child to the community long after it has moved on. It was seen as a way to complete the circle of Source, community, and child.

Placenta encapsulation is a more recent way to connect with the energy of this amazing organ. Popularized by midwife Raven Lang in the 80s it is now commonly done in natural birth circles throughout the western world. Though there is not much scientific research regarding encapsulation, the anecdotal evidence is promising. Mothers report less post partum depression, speedier recovery time, and increased milk production. I would encourage you to consume your placenta after birth either raw or encapsulated if you are drawn to do so. However, in my work with placenta,  I’ve seen it heal much more than this.

One of the most powerful experiences I had the honor of being a part of came from two best friends, their babies only a few months apart. The first woman had a hospital birth that did not go the way she had intended and she was handling a lot of grief around her experience these many months later. My client, was able to birth in a birth center and decided to encapsulate the placenta. She suggested to her friend that she come and help. As I washed and prepared the placenta, the best friend slowly began to watch with curiosity. I suggested she take over and she began rinsing the placenta in the sink. When she took this gift of life into her hands, I could see her whole body melt. She continued to rinse and massage the placenta, and soon started sobbing. Seeing that she was deeply reconnecting to the birth of her child, my client and I left the room so she could have some time to herself. After a bit, we came back to the kitchen and we both just put our hand on her shoulders and stood together. Sisters. Women. Carriers of life. The gateway to this world. Taking time to share gratitude with this gift of life, created a powerful moment of connection. A knowing that we had the ability to heal each other.

If you are pregnant and wondering about ways of honoring your placenta or have a previously frozen placenta awaiting ceremony of some kind or just wanna chat about it, please feel free to contact me. There are many things you can do with your placenta including encapsulation, making keepsakes with the umbilical cord, or making prints with the placenta and veil. I am a community herbalist and do a fair amount of wildcrafting. As an offering of gratitude, I sprinkle a bit of my child’s dehydrated placenta on the earth before I harvest. This is my way of connecting this gift to the gifts I receive that make my life whole and plenty. I am getting ready to move, so I am not currently offering any services myself, but have a few women I deeply trust I can refer you to or simply give you options to do it yourself or with your loved ones.

Either way, if you are able, I encourage you to consider connecting with the beautiful placenta you and your baby created and perhaps simply offer a bit of gratitude for its part in the amazing miracle of life.

 

Latisha defined: A girl, pacific northwest born, marries her soulmate, moves to the amazing sonoran desert, has two beautiful little girls, falls in love with nature’s medicine, and with her family, plans her move back home. She lives for the savory life, taking pride in her garden and being that good-smelling neighborhood herb lady. The rest is, well a work in progress. Some days she is that crunchy granola mom with a bustling kitchen, open window, potions on the counter, children happily at play outside in the dirt. Others she’s a pizza ordering, netflix watching, lazy gal who might forget she has children sitting next to her until a kissing scene comes on and they start climbing into her lap for a smooch.

She is a: Mama. Lover. Herb enthusiast. Writer. Desert dweller. Seeker. But most of all, a Work in progress.

To read more of her thoughts or to learn about using herbs as part of a healthy life, visit her blog at http://herbmother.com/

Feb 29
0

First Time Moms: Books for Birth and Beyond

By | Birth Week, Book reviews, Natural Health | 2 Comments

Speaking of birth…If you are expecting a sweet bundle of love or already have one, here are a few great books to add to your library.

Preparing for Birth

Birthing from Within by Pam England – Good resource for preparing for the spiritual and physical reality of childbirth without creating anxiety in the reader. It’s one of the only books I read on the subject that explores a woman’s expectations of childbirth and offers a review of options without condemning the reader if she has chosen a hospital birth. If you’re going to buy a book on the topic, skip the “What to expect…” books (they list everything that can possibly go wrong – like your mind doesn’t explore these possibilities already!) and just read this one.

If you’re looking for a month by month or week by week update on what’s going on with your body and your baby, there are some great – FREE – online tools that aren’t so scary!

The Breastfeeding Mother’s Guide to Making More Milk, Foreward by Martha Sears, RN – I realize this is not technically a birth book but it’s something you should read before having your baby. Breastfeeding may be natural but that doesn’t mean it’s always a walk in the park. Speaking as a mom who wanted desperately to breastfeed but had some major issues both times, I fell in love with this book and only wish I’d had it before my babies arrived. It is the most comprehensive guide to the mechanics of breastfeeding and supplemental options that I’ve ever read (and believe me, I’ve done my homework!!). If you buy one book on breastfeeding, this should be the one.

Herbal for the Childbearing Year, Susan Weed. Great book on healthy herbs for moms before, during and after pregnancy. Susan Weed is definitely a very earthy person but has an encyclopedic level of knowledge about herbs. I refer to this book frequently.

After your baby arrives

The Baby Book – Dr. William Sears and Martha Sears R.N. – I love this book for those middle of the night moments when your baby is crying and you’re trying not to freak out. It is a sort of middle of the road book – empowering parents to understand basic stages of growth and common baby ailments. Dr. Sears does advocate immunization but also gives parents great advice on what to do before heading to the doctor. I’ve saved a lot of money skipping unnecessary doctor visits (you know the, “It’s just a virus” ones?) with this book. Besides running their own successful pediatric practice, this couple has raised eight children of their own! One of their sons is on the show called “The Doctors“.

Smart Medicine for a Healthier Child – Zand, Roundtree and Walton. My sister-in-law bought this book for me. It also lists common childhood ailments and different treatment modalities for each ailment, including Herbal, Nutritional, Homeopathic or Allopathic (what an M.D. would prescribe). Fabulous book!

Herbal Recipes – Rosemary Gladstar. For those of you who would love to venture into using herbs for beauty or basic health, Rosemary Gladstar is a good place to start.

I am passionate about being educated about health. We moms are our families’ best doctors. Our intuition gives us insight into our kids’ health even before we can physically feel that they have a fever. Our love for them gives us the strength to stay up all night when they’re sick. But education give us confidence that we know the best course of action for a sick little person – whether that’s a home remedy and rest or a trip to the doctor. Now that’s a good feeling.

Blessings on you as you “doctor” your family. Hope these books help!

Feb 28
0

Birth Week: Gabi’s Story, The “Un-Hippy” HomeBirther

By | Birth Choices, Birth Week, Pregnancy | 2 Comments

 

Birth Week: Gabi’s Story, The “Un-Hippy” HomeBirther

 

When I found out I was pregnant I was planning on delivering in a hospital just like most other moms out there.  I didn’t really think I had a choice and never really thought about other options.  After watching several episodes of “One Born Every Minute” I started to get scared.  I didn’t want to have to go through all the L&D drama.  It seemed like there was always something wrong and I kept thinking “certainly there was a better, more gravity friendly, way to deliver a baby than lying on your back, right?”

I heard so many stories from friends about how their birth did not go the way they wanted, and about how they hoped things would go different next time.  I was determined to find a better way to birth, and so started my quest.

I share my story not in a judgmental way, because I believe every woman knows what is best for them; and what works for some does not work for others.  But I share in order to encourage other moms-to-be out there that you DO have choices in the way you birth!  And you don’t have to be a patchouli smelling, dreadlock wearing hippy to have a home birth.  For reference, I am an events director for a republican political committee.  My husband is an IT consultant and former White House staffer and we live in Washington DC.  We also drive a Prius.  So you could say we’ve broken some of those stereotypes people think of when a home-birther comes to mind!

After watching The Business of Being Born I realized that I wanted an “in control” birth like the ones shown in the documentary.  I wanted a birth where I could wear my own clothes, eat a snack if I wanted, and most importantly, deliver in any position that I wanted to. We were nowhere near deciding to do a homebirth at this point yet, but I thought if I could find a midwife who practiced this philosophy, or if my OBGYN was agreeable and I could be in the ‘safety’ of a hospital that would be great.  So at my 12 week appointment I told my OBGYN what I was thinking.  Although she was very supportive of what I wanted to do she explained to me the wonderful world of malpractice law and how she was obligated to follow the rules of the hospital she practiced out of which entails things like being attached to a fetal monitor, not eating during labor, etc.  So she gave me her blessing of moving out of her practice so I could start using the midwife practice I found in Alexandria, VA – BirthCare.

BirthCare is staffed by 7 Certified Nurse Midwives and specializes in out-of-hospital births.   They mostly do home births, but they also have a home-like birth center at their facility.  Their philosophy is for women to take responsibility for their own health.  One of my favorite parts is when I walk in the door they give me my file so I can review my charts and take my own weight and blood pressure.

Throughout most of our pregnancy we were planning on delivering at the onsite birth center.  It wasn’t until about 30 weeks when they encouraged us to think about doing a home birth.  After a home-visit from our birth assistant she looked around our house and said “you have a really nice place, why aren’t you guys considering a homebirth?”  My reasons included things like:

–          I didn’t want our things to get “hospital dirty” (even though our house was pretty much completely draped in throw away sheets)

–          I didn’t want my neighbors to hear “labor noises” from our apartment  (There wasn’t really any screaming that took place and our walls endured the test!  And when you’re in labor you just don’t care!)

–          I didn’t want my friends to judge me for being a total weirdo for having a home birth – because for some reason, explaining that we were going to a “birth center” was a little less weird and you could justify that it was a medical facility (even though it wasn’t)

–          When people came over to our house, I didn’t want people to think “did she give birth in the chair I’m sitting in? … ewww” (I’m over it)

As ridiculous as those things sound now, that was how I felt at the time.  I ended up checking in with two friends who had home births and felt encouraged.  The final decision came after our midwife explained that the birth center didn’t have anything additional there than we would have at home.  They make sure you are well prepared about one month in advance and that you have the supplies you need.  Our birth assistant came over (on her second home visit) to make sure we had everything put aside in one location, that it was orderly and that it worked correctly .  They also make sure you are pre-registered at your back-up hospital in the event you need to transfer.  After all this preparation, I felt well, prepared!

I started feeling my first contractions on our due date of November 4.    They felt like cramps and came in waves.  I thought “hey if this is what contractions feel like, they’re not that bad!” This was my last day of work, but I ended up staying home due to some spotting I had.  They suggested I just rest and stay off my feet.  I let Max know about the contractions but told him they were 45 minutes apart and it was no big deal.  My parents came over to hang out for a while that evening but we all knew this was going to be a while so they left and we told them we’d give them a call when things pick up.

My contractions continued throughout the whole night and began to intensify.  Max put me in the tub to relax which helped.  He also called the midwives to let them know we were managing fine but just to give them a heads up.  When they reached about 5 minutes apart, he gave them a call again and they were on their way.

My midwife (Alice), birth assistant (Claudia) and parents (Gil & Delia) arrived around 7:00 am on Saturday morning, November 5th.  It took them about 2 hours to unload their equipment and start paperwork, documenting my vitals, etc.  We put in a movie and just hung out, but in the process, my contractions started to slow down to about 10 minutes apart and stayed there.  Alice checked my cervix to see how far dilated I was – I was at 6 ½ – pretty good!  After checking the cervix, she suggested that everyone clear out to give us some privacy for a few hours so I could relax and perhaps try a little nipple stimulation to get the contractions going again.  Good suggestion, but it wasn’t all that comfortable and it didn’t really feel that great.   Once Alice came back I was pretty much stalled with contractions 10 minutes apart.  At this point, Alice suggested they leave for the rest of the afternoon and for us to call them when things started to pick up again.  I slept as best I could in 5 and 7 minute increments throughout the night and into the morning.

At about 2:00 am on Sunday morning, I felt like contractions were more frequent at 2-3 minutes apart lasting about 30 seconds.  To me these were consistent enough to call Alice again (little did I know that we still had a ways to go).  So, once again, Alice and Claudia arrive – and once again I stall out to about 5-7 minutes.  As soon as the sun came up Alice and Claudia conferred and made up a plan of how we should proceed for the rest of the day.  First, she wanted me to take a shower and get ready for the day.  Easy enough – sort of.  Once I finished my first assignment I came out refreshed and ready to face day.

Next, she said, “OK, now we’re all going to have breakfast together.  Do you have breakfast ingredients? “

“Yes,” I said studiously.

“Great!” replied Alice.  “You’re going to make it for us!”

I gave a nervous laugh because I thought she was kidding – but she wasn’t.  Her goal was to keep me moving to keep my contractions in motion.  So, again, like a good student I start taking out the bacon, eggs, cinnamon rolls and juice.  This brought on a whole new meaning to “barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen” as I would stop for contractions every 4 minutes while frying up an egg.  But this was exactly the part of having a home birth that I enjoyed.  Being comfortable in my own home and serving others while they served me.  Breakfast wasn’t bad either!

After everything was cleaned up, our next assignment was to take a walk.  After cooking breakfast and cleaning up, I REALLY didn’t want to go outside in the cold – but I also wanted to get our sweet baby out, so off we went.  And we actually had a good time!  Max and I walked around the block.  Stopped by the CVS to get a newspaper and some toothpaste.  Then to the bakery to get some of my favorite cookies.  We were gone for about an hour, stopping every 5 minutes or so for a contraction.  And yes, lots of funny looks from passers by!

Once we came home our Birth Assistant, Claudia, informed me she had another birth to go to and asked if I would mind having another midwife from our practice assist us for the remaining time.  It was about 1:00 pm in the afternoon and still no baby.  I was starting to feel like the “watched pot” that everyone was waiting on to boil.  As much as I love my parents, and wanted them to be there, I started to feel like I was getting a little performance anxiety.  I felt like they were bored (even though they weren’t) and that I needed to be some type of a hostess (even though I didn’t).  I expressed this to my parents along with our midwife and Alice said it would be perfectly fine to ask my parents to leave.  I needed to be relaxed and if having my parents there was not relaxing then asking them to leave might be for the best.  My parents were so understanding and knew that it was for the best.  It also revealed to my mom that birth is not just a physical process – but every bit an emotional one as well.  They gave me a kiss and a prayer and we told them we’d check in once things started to happen.  When they left Alice suggested that she leave as well for a few hours to give us some privacy and she would return with our new midwife Julia.  Parting words from Claudia, “Remember, the love that got the baby in, is the same thing that will get the baby out (hint, hint).”  I really couldn’t think of anything more awkward because I was so big and felt rather unattractive, “But hey – why not give it a shot?  I really want this baby out and even though I don’t feel attractive, you’re pretty cute, Max!”  So we gave it the old college try – and finally … progress.

Alice and Julia came back around 3:00 pm that Sunday afternoon.  Max and I took one more walk, but this time I couldn’t even make it around the block.  Progress!  When we came home we were all sitting in the living room and my water broke around 5:00 pm!  Progress!!

I did the majority of my tough contractions (right before transition) in our bedroom next to the bed leaning against the birth ball or on hands and knees. They weren’t pushing contractions but they were very intense and painful.  Even though we were in very active labor I just didn’t feel like I was opening up.  My midwife went ahead and did another check.  I was 9 ½ centimeters dilated, but I had a lip on my cervix preventing the baby from being at a fetal station of 0.  Through the next 8-12 contractions, Alice had her hand inside of me to help guide the baby out of the lip.  These contractions were much more comfortable for me.  Once we “straightened the snag” we just needed to open up that last ½ centimeter.  Contractions were extremely painful and long lasting.

We moved to the shower to help relax a little more and this is when we hit transition.  I could barely stand in the shower.  I had Max guide me down so I could get on hands and knees while saying “I just want to pass out.   Please just let me pass out.”  Well, no one let me pass out.  They just helped me crawl out of the shower and into the other bathroom where I could sit in the tub and not have to stand.  Being in the tub was the most effective tool.  It was here where I fully opened up and started to feel the urge to push (finally!).  Once I got out of the tub I began to push in a squatting position and standing in between contractions.  I also had a mirror underneath me to watch the progress.  At this point it was about 1:00 am Monday morning.  After laboring for so long and doing about 4 hours of squatting and standing, Alice and Julia were concerned I would not have the energy to keep squatting when it was time to get the baby out so they suggested I move to the bed.  Reluctantly, I took their recommendation (I really wanted to stay squatting but figured it was probably a good idea to lay down for a while).  It was amazing to see the progression of Polly’s arrival with the mirror and to be able to touch and feel her head with each push.

Once we moved to the bed it was go time.  I was in a sitting position and gave about 8-10 pushes that finally got our sweet little Polly out.  Surprisingly, the “ring of fire” was a welcome change to the pain from the contractions I was feeling earlier.  On Monday, November 7 at 2:35 am I gave my last push.  Polly’s little body just slid right out and she immediately began to cry with no spanking, no suction.  She was a beautiful pink color and very responsive.  She was finally here and so amazing.  They wrapped her up and she immediately snuggled up to me and began to nurse.

Because of my low hemoglobin count toward the end of my pregnancy they gave me a bit of Pitocin as soon as she came out to get the placenta out right away and prevent hemorrhage.  About 15 minutes later I gave my final push.  Once the placenta came out they inspected it to make sure it was intact, which it was – We were out of the woods!

The whole process was 51 hours that I wouldn’t trade for the world.  Giving birth is hard work and rewarding work.  I started out doing this as a challenge to myself to see if I could do it.  But as we started learning more, we just wanted our daughter to be in the most healthy, safe and stress free environment – and for us, that was having her at home.  If you are a healthy mom having a healthy pregnancy, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t consider a home birth.  Do your research and find a good, reputable midwife with the numbers to back them up.  Throughout your 40 weeks you will be poked, prodded and asked enough questions that if a home birth is no longer a safe option for you, they will let you know.  And always trust your instinct.  One of the purposes of having a home birth is to reduce anxiety.  So if at any time you feel an out-of-hospital birth is not right for you, by all means, tell your midwife and they will help you get into a good practice that will work to keep mom and baby healthy.

My last bit of advice would be to get into a good Bradley Method class.  The Bradley Method is a 12-week series of childbirth classes designed for those having a natural, unmedicated, childbirth.  It teaches that a woman’s body is designed to handle childbirth, gives an active role to the mother’s partner (also called the coach) and teaches the importance of relaxation and proper breathing during the process.  Even if you do not plan on having an unmedicated birth, my husband and I highly recommend this series as it educates the couple exactly how the mother’s body works during each stage of labor and how the body is working for you and not against you (which can relieve a lot of anxiety during the particularly painful parts of labor).  Classes are designed to be small for individualized attention.   You can read more about the Bradley Method and find one in your area here:  http://www.bradleybirth.com/

 

 Gabi Everett is wife of Max Everett and mom to their four month old daughter, Polly.  She and Max have been married for three years and currently live in Washington, DC.  Gabi graduated with a broadcasting degree from Arizona State and is the director of events for a Republican political committee.  She enjoys living in the city, opening her home to friends and family, vacationing in fun places and learning new things – like how to rock her new position as working mother!  She loves sharing her life with others and being open about the struggles and joys of marriage, family and friendship and hopes to one day join the blogosphere nation.

Feb 27
0

First Time Moms: What to Expect in Your First Labor

By | Birth Choices, Birth Week, Pregnancy | 3 Comments

As I get ready to give birth again, I’ve been thinking a lot of past labors and how they feel in relation to second and third labors. The first time was SO different from the second both in terms of physical ease and, I think, in terms of knowing what to expect and probably feeling a little less fearful. Since so many of my girlfriends and readers are getting ready to labor for the first time, I wanted to spend a little time talking about this today.

First, it’s really normal and perfectly fine to feel a little fearful of the unknown. Before my first birth, I had some strong opinions about the kind of labor I wanted to have – natural and unmedicated. I wanted to embrace the strength I knew was inside of me, that my mom and grandma and great-grandmother had shown in giving birth. I knew I was joining a sisterhood of women who had done this before me. This strengthened me. I did my research, took a birth class, asked for advice. But…in truth, I was still a little freaked out about the whole, you know, pushing-a-head-out-my-special-place part of childbirth.

The best way to get over fear is to examine it, answer it and move past it. Not only did I face my fear, I  also delivered a 9lb 7 oz baby (yes, out of my “special place”) and learned a few important things about first births in the process. Hopefully, they’ll encourage you!

1.Educate yourself about birth and pick a doctor who fits your philosophy of birth by asking open ended questions. Trust your gut. If you don’t like him or her, switch. Labor is not a time to decide you REALLY don’t like your doc.

2. Pick a hospital with birthing tubs (or, you know, have your baby in your own tub!). Defy gravity in a tub of warm water. If you’re in active labor it will relax you, not slow contractions. You can always get out to birth.

3. Write a friendly (and BRIEF!) birth plan outlining your desired labor for the nursing staff.

4. Lose the term “false alarms” or false labor. Think of those as “warm-ups”. If it’s close to bedtime, have a snack and try to go to sleep. If you can sleep, chances are it’s not time yet.

5. First labors (usually) start slowly. Rarely will the bag of waters rupture all like in the movies while mom falls to the floor wailing in pain. I had several days of contractions where I thought – “This is it!”  – and then things sort of slowed down.

6. First labors can last a long time so mentally prepare for birth to take whatever time it needs. Trust that your body is working just right.  Don’t let anyone pressure you into hurrying. While there are times that induction is appropriate, research seems to indicate that unecessary induction drugs like Pitocin may lead to unnecessary C-sections. Do your research in advance and choose a birth attendant who will respectfully discuss your options with you.

7. Choose your birth team wisely. Hire a doula, a midwife or bring a supportive friend to encourage you and stand up for you during birth. You’ll need the encouragement and your partner will probably appreciate the backup.

8. Stay home as long as you can while in labor if you’re planning a hospital birth. You’ll be more relaxed and you may even progress faster. There are a lot of other things to distract you at home. Once you’re at the hospital, there’s little else to think about other than the labor.

9. Move around as much as possible in labor and if you can, avoid drugs so you can eat and drink in labor. You’ll need the energy.

10. If you get a nurse who you’re not connecting with, politely ask for a new one.

11. Transition is success! If you’re like me and chose the natural route, it might also be entitled the “Holy crap, WHY IN THE WORLD DID I THINK I WANTED A NATURAL BIRTH?” phase of labor. Congrats mom. Remember, if you’re here – you’re almost there. You can do it! You’re close to the finish, sister, so don’t lose heart!

12. The “Ring of Fire” is your friend. It will tell you when to push and when to take a break. Self-directed (rather than doc-directed) pushing will result in more effective pushing and a lowered likelihood of tearing. Don’t hide from the intensity. Dive in and allow it to bring you that much closer to your little one. Reach your hand down and feel for your baby’s head. If you want, have someone place a mirror where you can see your progress.

Girls, don’t freak out about seeing your own vagina. How in the world do you think that baby got there?! You’ll be amazed at the incentive you feel to push if you see a little head making its appearance.

13. Remember – you and your partner are the parents. Unless your baby needs emergency care, you can choose for her to stay with you instead of going to the nursery. (The caveat for this is if you don’t have a private room post birth). When our daughter left the room for weighing or tests, Robert went with her.

A few more thoughts…

As you near birth, something wonderful happens that helps you to overcome your fear (if you’re feeling any). Suddenly, all you can think of is, “GET THIS BABY OUT OF ME!!!” You’re big, unwieldy and (if you’re like me), HOT!! I think this is nature’s way of giving women triumph over fear of labor. Go with it! Just keep in mind that your “due date” – is just an estimate! Some babies just take longer to make their appearance. I have friends who’ve delivered more than once at 42 weeks. Patience. Your baby will know just the right time to arrive.

Before my first baby, a doctor explained something about the pain of labor that revolutionized my thinking. Unlike the acute pain of having surgery or breaking a bone, labor is progressive in intensity ~ almost wavelike ~ in the way it moves a woman toward birth. My doc encouraged me that an epidural is not a necessary part of labor. I really held on to her words as I went into that first labor. It worked. With each increase of intensity, I adjusted!

Early labor is a great time to practice getting used to the “wave” with deep breaths and, if necessary, low vocalizing or moaning. Unlike the high pitched, panicked sounds women in television shows make to highlight the drama of the moment, lower sounds relax the body for delivery. My midwife (who I used for our second birth), encouraged me to visualize large, round openings and to think of each contraction as softening the edges of the openings my baby needed to exit.

Most importantly, regardless of whether you’ve chosen a home birth or a hospital one, be flexible and forgiving about how your birth progresses. While you want to be informed and have a plan, birth doesn’t always go quite as we intend. If yours doesn’t, acknowledge it – and then move on. Be in awe of the powerful and courageous woman – YOU –  who spent nearly a year growing a beautiful life and then  delivered it to the world.

That’s right – YOU delivered that baby, not your doc or your midwife!!

Focus on recovering and enjoying that new baby!

I wish you a safe and happy delivery and many years of joy with the new family member you’re expecting.

For more encouragement, read a few “first births” like Gabi’s birth story or my first birth story.